Platinum Slut

I swear this world is going down the tubes. What next- the apocalypse? Sweet baby Jesus! Who, who do we have to blame for taking our beloved term slut and turning it into a put down?! Who did it? I curse you, you inconsiderate little witch!!! Now the rest of us true sluts out there forever have to live with the debauchery you've created with your loosey goosey ways. Sluts and man whores everywhere suffer due to ONE, ONE slut who didn't have standards! Silence!!! I keel you. :( It's a tragedy- a tragedy I tell you! I'm in mourning. Gone are the days when slut just meant a sexually promiscuous person. Now it's- an untidy woman that sleeps with anything that walks. Curse! I curse you, you easy girl you!!!



I may consider myself promiscuous but just because I'm sexually active it does not mean I am untidy , nor does it mean I don't have standards! The horror!!! Untidy! Sweet Mother! I have never, never had an STD nor do I ever plan on having one- untidy?! Oh, no this shit is clean! Also- a slut has to have standards! I may sleep around but that doesn't mean I'm jumping into a bed, or a car or a bathroom, or a... you get the point; I'm not just going to hook up with anyone that offers! Now because of this evil woman the term slut is no longer safe! I want my title back- and in good standings! No- now we have to define the levels of slutiness! A slut just isn't a slut anymore. The namesake is ruined!


So many titles have been ruined in this world due to stereotypes! Women, give women a bad name! There are so many naggy, sexless, bitchy women out there that men get the wrong impression of us. Women- work with me here! Give us a good name again! The women out there that are not naggy, sexless bitchy beings are the minority and we are suffering! Just like the nice guys! Yeah- they always finish last because there are so many assholes out there that give men a bad rap. I say minorities unite! Lets take back our titles!!


I wish it were that easy. Fine- I'm taking my name back but I'm putting my own spin on it! I'm a platinum slut! That's right! All the true sluts out there- the ones that have standards, we're the platinum sluts. We got tight security in our place! Member's only, penthouse baby. First class. Confidential. Top secret. Are you on the list? No? Well then you don't get in! Platinum member's only! You loosey goosey women- the ones that have made our slutiness a bad thing- you're brass sluts. That's right. No security- just anyone is allowed in your joint. Open doors- 24 hour service. Ugh! It's horrible!


I'm telling you- this world is seriously going to hell in a hand basket. Women can't be women, men can't be men, sluts can't be sluts. Man whores- well you're still free to be you. It seems only women suffer the derogatory meaning when it comes to being sexually active. Man whores- you're considered studs! Yeah- if men sleep around they are pimps! Women do that same thing and they are dirty whores! Whatever- if that is the case so be it! Call me a slut then! But I'm a platinum slut- the minority, and don't you forget it!


Just in case you are not aware- I totally mean this in a joking manner. I have a very sarcastic sense of humor and don't mean to offend anyone :) But honestly, if you can't handle a joke- you're looking at the wrong blog!!!